Meet the Campus Wildlife/by Elijah Cardenas

One of the most interesting features of Mississippi College’s picturesque campus is one that isn’t included in the tuition costs. The wildlife at MC continually provides a feeling of life and vitality to campus that other campuses in the area lack, no matter how different they claim their squirrels are.

A host of strange and curious creatures have called MC their home over the years – and that doesn’t even include the freshmen. One of the most curious encounters recently recorded was by MC student Laura Derrow, who recounted the time she saw an armadillo outside the Leland Speed Library.

“I was driving in front of the library and just saw this armadillo sitting in the grass outside of the library,” said Derrow. “I guess he was just trying to get that education.” Even the most relaxed MC students can relate to a hard working armadillo burning the midnight oil studying for midterms.

One familiar creature that haunts MC hollows is Whittington Hall’s very own Trash Cat. For over four years, Trash Cat has been a beloved member of the MC family and a friend to every Whittington resident. An elusive creature by nature, Trash Cat is rumored to still dwell in the bushes and trash cans near the Whit, maintaining its status as a benevolent mascot of MC.

However, some students believe that the animals at MC have a more nefarious purpose here then cranking out all nighters in the study pods. Lana Estes, another student at MC and a friend of Derrow’s, reported a disturbing incident involving the roaches at MC.

“I was with some freshmen and the sprinklers went off and all the sudden they started screaming and dancing around about roaches,” Estes claims. “They must have thought that the roaches were going to carry them off.” Estes goes on to explain that the reason behind this disturbing roach kidnapping scheme must be their envy for MC student’s rights to caf food. “They’ve got plans,” Estes assured The Collegian.

Now, an isolated incident like an attempted roach abduction can be overlooked fairly easily. However, roaches don’t appear to be the only animals on campus with dark designs in mind. Estes also previously encountered what she described as an “agitated bird, one of the only birds she recalls ever having seen at MC.

Estes, too, struggled to recall her last bird sighting for The Collegian. “I can’t remember the last time I saw a bird,” Estes confessed. “Maybe they’re right about birds being secret government spy drones.” With rumors of aggressive birds flying around campus, such conspiracies cannot be too closely examined.

But birds and roaches haven’t been the only crooked creatures detected on MC’s grounds. According to MC student Elijah Wilson, a prior resident of Whittington Hall, students should also keep a wary eye out for the squirrels at MC.

“There was one time the squirrels tried to kill me.” Wilson reports. “I think it’s a conspiracy.” Wilson went on to give The Collegian the inside scoop on the truth behind the MC variety of squirrels. “They’re larger than usual and hyper-intelligent.” Wilson, who has since been placed in protective custody, believes this to be connected to the government planted birds that Estes bravely informed The Collegian of.

With so many similar stories compiled side by side, a sinister narrative has begun to surface from the shadows under MC’s lush trees. Should students be concerned about an animal cabal at MC that is actively seeking their undoing? Whatever the case, students should keep both eyes open for the wildlife on the Mississippi College campus.

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